Happy and Gay!

I have named the painting..."What does the future hold for my son...".

The painting was posted in another website called "Penciljammers.com", and few of my friends liked it and some even liked the title too... said it was very touching. I am glad it did touch their sensibilities.

After the initial seriousness...my quirky nature said, "Can you imagine...there was another topic running in my mind that I decided to forego for this one. Would u like to know what it was...well it was like, "Kahin mera betaa badaa hoke gay toh nahin banegaaa...." LOL!! Haa...haaa...haaaa... Considering the way things are moving, this might well be a real concern when he grows up.... Heeeeee...heeeee....hee...!!!

To which one of my friends said, "whats with 'u' n 'gays' ............... u come up with it more often than others .............. koi thesis kar raha hai kya ?"

My reaction was both funny and serious to some extent. Something like this - Haa...haaaaa...I am kinda exploring the idiom..."happy and gay"... trying to figure out whether they are independent variables or dependent...and if dependent...whether being 'happy' is dependent on being 'gay' or, being 'gay' is dependent on being 'happy'... haaa...haaa!!!!...

My world and my sensitivities are a case of muddled curiosity to explore the other side, and acceptance of the extraordinary. I dont generally speak for or against any experience....its each to his own actually. I just want to understand them all and respect them for accepting and standing up for what they believe in, as it is! The only underlying platform on which all my curiosity floats is that there should be no harm to anybody...both emotional or physical...internal or external...alien or earthly...practical or spiritual... haaah...its indeed a funny case with me... but biologically, I strongly believe, if all were to be gay... in the short term...some of the problems would disappear...and in the long-term mankind too! 

When a father grows with his son...

When my son was born...little did I realize that it was going to be a lifetime of learning for me again. Its a brand new companionship, a relationship where I will witness tremendous change taking place right in front of my eyes. The first time he looked onto my face and straight into my eyes, as if to say, "baba, now we are three...and I will always be there with thee...". Its a feeling that keeps on growing with each passing day. 

There were times that I could not see him awake for days on...but there was this reassurance that even if I don't see him eating, playing or adding new words to his vocabulary...I will always be his father, his "baba" - a word in his ever-increasing repertoire of words that will always remain with him throughout his life. Of course! I am prepared for the different meanings the word "baba" will take as he grows up into a boy, a teen, a young lad, a boyfriend to someone, husband to the one, a father to more...

"ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ" holds new meaning for me now...there is an overwhelming sense of joy when he speaks out all the seasons, the months in a year, the days in a week correctly. Its as if every day, every month, every season is so fresh and welcoming again...suddenly I am aware of all the fruits and vegetables that he names. 

He is just four now, and it is real fun growing up with him....learning not to speak the words I don't want him to utter, behaving the way I want him to follow and behave...I am learning again...I am growing again!

Know me...

I suppose I am a thinker... 'cause it’s undemanding this way, than to act.


Its easier to be glued to my favorite location in that unassumingly comfortable position and blabber off half-hearted, non-executing opinions about what’s wrong the world over... how it ought to be and why things turn out to be awful or usually pathetic everyday.

believe in 'us'

My brain is always churning ideas my body is so lazy to act upon. I always feel there’s so much to be done - why everyone (but me!) isn’t doing to save this world! Why does everyone for haven’s sake not believe in us 'human beings' as one community? Why does it take an adversity to bring out the saviours in ourselves to defend our own kind?